Saturday, December 27, 2008

it's two for one tonight

in one day, almost all of my problems got solved.

first off, i got my brand-spankin new CPU! complete with all the specs i wanted. now the only thing i lack is the time to download and play all of the games that i have been fantasizing for quite a while now. we also got a new lcd monitor, so now i can watch movies with booming sound and HDTV quality. haha! :P

then, i got myself a globe sim for free, care of the promo from SM dept. store. funny thing is, my girlfriend's number and my new one both start with 0915 and have three 7s in them. sooo cute!

i still need to fix the hard drive issues and figure out how to manage our new wireless router. haha! till next time!

and oh, i hope you have a blessed Happy New Year! :D

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

its the most wonderful time of the year

it was supposed to be a very Merry Christmas for me. but as of December 21, events that really sucked kind of ticked me way off and thus the enjoyment that Christmas was supposed to bring wasn't really that felt anymore.

let me count the reasons:
reason number 1:
today marks the 3rd day that the Globe service number 2870 has not responded to the zillions of texts appropriately typed "Unlitxt80" to my phone. at first i thought it was just a network problem, but it seems everyone around me except for myself has now been registered to the unlimited texting service offered by globe.

this led me to the conclusion that my sim is the culprit and the only ways to deal with it would be either to break it in f*cking half and buy a new one. so for now i am forced to utilize the sulitxt promo and just let my remaining load balance dry up before i change numbers again.

reason number 2:
CPU situation. as of now i do not honestly think that my parents would be giving me funds to buy a new computer. with that fact, any idea to buy new shoes and shirts after Christmas would be thrown out of the window. they have suggested that i try to save up for the new PC, and that is really what i intend to do. and if i succeed, NO ONE but me gets to touch the PC. i don't really care about them anymore, so long as i can build my own PC and use it. i don't really want to get stuck unto a laptop that crashes when you open more than 2 tabs in Firefox.

reason number 3:
bad dreams. well, for 3 days every time i slept, i would always dream of bad things or bad/embarrassing situations. thankfully, that episode is over and i can go on with my life now.


as bad as it may seem, i still have found things which have made life better for me in this period of time.
1. it's vacation time! no school sh*t to worry about. not until after new year.
2. basketball. i may have gotten better in playing. the shots have not been dropping yet, but it seems that my defense has improved, and i somehow added about 1 or 2 inches in my vertical leap. this may be a product of the leg stretching that i do every morning or maybe i just got a little lighter. i am now in the process of getting some post moves so i can become a better all-around player.
3. SIMBANG GABI complete! for the 2nd year i have managed to wake up at 3am to attend morning masses for 9 days. i wish for more blessings to come for next year, just as good as this year has come for me, or maybe ever better. :)

though life sucks right now, i'll never lose hope for things to get better. maybe i should remember what that priest was saying during simbang gabi. a little patience could go a long way. i don't really think there is really a feasible solution to end the little problems i have been encountering this holiday season, but i believe that a little more patience in my part can go a long way.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO ALL! IT'S PARTY TIME! :D

Monday, December 01, 2008

basketball

i'm tired right now. but somehow, i feel alive.

that's how it is whenever i step-off the court after a few pick-up games. for many reasons, whenever i don't play the game i become really sluggish and well, sometimes incomplete. playing ball invigorates me, jumpstarts my body and my mind. i can't really live somewhere that does not have a court. believe me, i would go crazy if that happened.

i noticed that i talk a lot of things in my personal space, but i have not discussed a lot about how the game has affected me. the game hasn't been always good to me. since i was little when my cousins who came from the province taught me how to dribble, shoot and pass, all i ever wanted was to become good at it. basketball the game taught me how to be competitive. but being small and skinny back then, i was not really the one that i pictured myself playing the game. in short, i sucked. haha!

but luckily, i had a set of basketball crazy friends and classmates who picked me up, so there. i got a little better every year, and i now made it a point to add something to my game, no matter how little it is, from defending better to reading opponent sets and setting better screens, i work hard to make my game more complete. it also helped that competition was good, so i was able to measure myself against them. though it is still hard for me to see the kinks in my game so i rely a lot on the inputs i get from friends. so far my shot is already falling, so i don't really have to hear my teammates whining whenever i pull-up. haha! it's more of being aggressive in attacking the basket, getting rebounds and defending the opponent so that they do not get the easy shot.

so there ends my small, disconcerted, patchy effort to talk about the game. i wrote a scouting report about myself some years ago, i can't find it but i should say i have come far from being that player who could only go to his left and has a shaky shot. :D

Sunday, November 30, 2008

funeral for a friend

it is now official. i now have one dead friend.

i heard the news of his death a day after it happened. right after i went home, i had my mom go with me to his wake. he was a friend since my preschool days. his mom and my mom were good friends, so my mom was shocked when i told her the sad news.

as we went to the wake, i saw almost everyone who were parts of my early childhood. to make it short, i saw all of my elementary batchmates. almost everyone was there during the four day wake. we went ahead to see him, and that was i think the first time i saw tears from my mother in a long while. i can't really describe her relationship with his mom, but what i do know is that they are really, really good friends and that his mom was our official family pediatrician so i saw them a lot during my childhood years. at first, i really did not feel anything. yes, i was saddened and all, but seeing everyone else and remembering the good times pretty much preoccupied my mind during the wake. i knew it had to be more than this, but i guess the fact that he has truly departed was not sinking yet in my mind.

then came the funeral.

i really did not know how, but hearing the priest emphasize that of the 3 dead people that were to be undergoing necrological service today, my friend was the youngest. i think that part really struck me. how come a strong 20-year old individual come down so fast and so sudden? how can someone who is just at the cusp of enjoying the world have his life abruptly cut? and so the feeling of loss made itself felt. i was crying. crying hard. i was mourning. i felt the collective grief that gripped that whole cathedral that afternoon. so this is how it feels to lose a friend. it hurts. and somehow i find it kind of regretful that his death came at a very suprising time.

they say that death comes like a thief in the night. adhering to that, death came and stole one of our dear friends away. it was encouraging to see almost everyone make it, but if we wanted to get together, all of us, i do not think it's really fun to get together in a wake. i hope we all get through this. somewhere, somehow we can see him smiling, being jolly and having fun because we would all be secure. it also helps to know that so many people came and saw everything from the wake to the funeral. it is a very, very crushing event, but afterwards everyone of us would be asked to move on..

but let us not forget that we have the capacity to improve ourselves and look back at this experience as an eye-opener for taking life for granted. personally, i did not think that dying this early cannot happen, yet it did. this now poses a challenge to all of us to take a step back and appreciate everything that has been given to us.

we can always sugarcoat everything, cloud them with fruity and colorful words to make them easier to bear. but sometimes, it takes one deep breath and a strong will to face what happened. a loss is still a loss, no matter what anybody says.

so, may you rest in peace pareng nikko. pahinga ka lang dyan, antagal-tagal mo nang pinapagod ang sarili mo. alam naming babantayan mo pa rin kaming lahat. kahit nasaan ka pa man.

Saturday, November 08, 2008

power down!

the reason i wasn't really online the past couple of days (more than a week i say) is because my beloved cpu is still under repair. it was supposed to be only a routine reinstall of windows, but suddenly the power supply gave in and it would not turn on. i has really not bugged me since i took it upon myself as a chance to do things other than shell up to my pc.

i went out, socialized, watched movies, spent time with the girl i love, improved my game (now that's an achievement) and currently enjoyed this old-school lifestyle having no technology around me except for my mobile phone.

i really had a great week, and the only glitch i could think of is that of my cpu not returning home. but i know everything would be set right eventually. for the meantime, it would be best for me to focus on things other than my computer.

let me talk a little about the nba today, since the league has gone through already its first week.

billups-iverson trade:
i really did not think it was serious when my friends told me about in a party i went to, but it was real, and today both players has suited up for their new teams with Iverson losing to the Nets and the Mavs leading Billups' Nuggets in the 3rd Qtr as of this moment.

i think it was a win-win for both teams, since Detroit honcho Joe Dumars wanted to shake the core which many believed has underperformed in the past 3 yrs even though going into the Eastern Conf Finals for six straight years is really nothing to be ashamed about. The Iverson-Anthony experiment of Denver wasn't also getting them past the First Round of the postseason so as it stands, a change of scenery was to take place. Even Iverson knew he was going to be traded because he was already on his contract year and Denver did not really pursue on signing him an extension.

With Iverson, they get a Hall of Fame caliber guy that may give them that scoring punch and superstar factor that Dertroit has managed to live without for years, relying only on the team which featured Billups, Hamilton, Prince and the two Wallaces. He can shoot the ball, break defenses down and run the break. The only problem with that is Detroit may have to give up a lot of defense in the backcourt with the loss of Chauncey. We must remember that Iverson is only 6ft in height, and Detroit has to defend guards like Arenas, Wade and Kobe. Defense has not been part of Iverson's calling card though he may have led the league in steals a couple of years ago, coaches do not like the fact that gambling on defense may cause the offensive player to get a clean shot since a gamble does not really translate into a turnover.

The Nuggets meanwhile, get a lot of defense and shooting from one of the best in the business today, and the good news is Chauncey is still in his prime. It's like having Andre Miller back, because apart from the points and assists, Billups built his name on leading the team that went to six straight Conference Finals. The only problem I see here is that, it may take some time for Chauncey to integrate himself into the Nuggets' system. Good things come with Billups, as Denver now has someone more consistent to back-up their budding star in Carmelo Anthony. The fact that Billups too has come from a system that puts a prime on defense may affect a change in culture in Denver. Like many observers, i feel that to advance into the playoffs, defense must first be improved and with the addition of Billups the Nuggets get a high quality, all star caliber point guard.

update:
Denver leads the Dallas, 83-79, 9:22 left in the 4th.

Miami Heat:
posting a quality win over the Spurs today (though that would be dubious since Parker and Ginobili were out, Parker injured himself in the 1st Qtr.), the Heat or Dwyane Wade actually, have shown that they are back. At last, after the failure that is last season, Wade has come back with gusto. The insane shots, bankers, splits, sidesteps and jumpers are back, and it was fun to watch him kill the Spurs this morning.

i've seen Michael Beasley's game, and i have to say i was impressed. Shawn Marion is not really a fit into the Heat's style. I would like to him being moved for say, Al Harrington (who wants to be traded anyway), a player who can post up and hit the three-ball with ease. Marion is not really a half-court guy, and most of his success comes from running the break. Miami has not really been that set on running teams out of the building, but the versatility he brings is still valued by the team. I think that though he may not be viable on offense, defensively he should bring it for the team. the rebounds, blocks and steals that he can create can effectively lead into transition baskets which can bode well for Marion.

ultimately, the Heat must find success in defense to keep Marion happy. Otherwise, I'd like to see him be moved along with the large sum of money in his contract.


so there ends a blog entry for me. i hope my cpu would be back and that things go the way i would want them to. :D

Sunday, October 26, 2008

its nice to be back!

hindi naman sa nag out of town trip ako o kung anuman, pero isang malaking kaluwagan na umayos na ulit ang buhay ko ngayon. hahaha!!!

naka-XP na ulit ang pc, excited na akong mamili ng bagong parts pang upgrade rito. by grad gusto ko nang magpapalit ng pc. papabuo ako ng bago. hehehe!!!

masaya na ulit ang buhay. and it has rubbed off as well to the people around me. sana magtuloy-tuloy na ito. salamat ng marami Lord!!! :D

(salamat din sa yo. lalo na run sa 2x2 na bigay mo. wahaha!!)

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

malas

malas. malas. malas. malas. malas.

puro na lang malas!!! nitong mga huling araw puro malas ang inabot ko sa halos lahat ng bagay na ginawa ko sa buhay.

talaga bang aabutin to ng isang linggo? wag naman sana. pero kung ganun na rin lang, sige ok yun. kahit papano baka may matutunan ako tungkol sa sarili ko. tungkol sa iba. tungkol sa buhay.

sa ngayon, isa lang ang masasabi ko...


MALAAAAAAAAAS!


buti na lang di nya ako iiwan. :D (oo ikaw yung tinutukoy ko!)

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

finally

sometimes, we don't really get the things that we want because we are store to receive something better.

after giving it time to settle in, i finally got it. i now understood why things did not work out the way i wanted them to be.

what i didn't know was, there already was someone waiting for me. were we really fated to meet each other? the circumstances around us tell me that indeed, maybe we are. i never imagined that along the way as i progressed in my life that i would meet someone who has complimented me so well. someone who has made me feel appreciated and loved. someone who has inspired me to exceed what i have expected of myself.

thank you. you and your impeccable timing really did wonders in my life.
thanks for another great day. cheers to a million more. :D


Monday, October 06, 2008

commuting, GG, weather and basketball high

i was supposed to be blogging this way earlier, but since we enjoyed a few rounds of FOC i was amazed that it was already 12:30 in the midnight. last time i looked at the clock, it was just 8pm! time flies when i'm in front of the pc. haha!!

anyway, i just wanted to tell the story of my 1 1/2 hr bus ride going home. it was a friday back then, around 7pm. it's every commuter's nightmare. rush hour set in, and the heavy traffic on the other side of Taft Ave made me realize that going to Lawton may just add more time to my commute going home. 

waiting for a bus was excrutiating. what made it worse is that every bus going south had to be standing for the rest of the trip. what made it really painful was that when i boarded the bus, there wasn't any more room at the back so i was forced to stand in front where most of the compression between passengers happen the worst. malas ko lang ganid yung konduktor at nagmamadali na akong umuwi kaya nagtiis ako.

so for more than an hour, i stood in a very awkward position which left both my legs in atrophy since i couldn't really move, and that my left leg was awkwardly positioned while supporting all my body weight because my other leg was also bent in a not very normal way. then when i came to have a seat (finally!!!), this lady beside me kept on elbowing me. really nastty stuff happening in my friday night commute. good thing i was able to rest upon arriving home. but then i kind fell asleep and left my girl hanging. (really sorry!!!!)

so there's that friday commute nightmare. and then there's the weather which has been freakishly erratic for the last couple of weeks. best case was that which happened to me this past saturday. it was around 2:30 in the afternoon when i left manila to go home and try to play some ball. i thought the time i give myself would be enough, then i underestimated the saturday traffic. i still can't figure out what goes on during saturday afternoons that make Bacoor traffic really heavy. the bus i was riding on got stuck around SM Bacoor. the sun was shining there, so i said to myself that i should just be easy and not panic because i'd be able to catch another game though not the first.

then, as we crossed the rotunda that bridges across SM, the sky went black and raindrops came in. IN A SNAP OF A FINGER AS WE CROSSED THE STREET. then more horror came as we lumbered toward Imus. that's when the torrents came in. it was like Katrina struck Imus. bad trip tuloy. as i descended the bus i immediately got soaking wet within seconds which forced me to get a tricycle home. sayang ang pera, magastos kasi yung trike. bwisit na ulan di ako nakapaglaro ng basketbol. so what did i do? i ate. i ate kamote na may asukal and caramel crunch ice cream ba yun (ah basta masarap!) kaya ayun guminhawa pakiramdam ko. yun pala silbi ng comfort food.

finally, the NBA and PBA seasons kick-off in October. sarap na ulit manood ng tv. tapos may malapit na rin sembreak namin, e di laro na naman. haha! sana nga lang makalaro ako. may thesis pa pala akong gagawin. 

i want to improve my game. and i want a new ball. haha!!!

so there, that's all ya need to know. i may be posting my Christmas wishlist next time. maybe. haha! :)

Sunday, September 21, 2008

chris paul love

I BROUGHT NEW SHOES TODAY.

yup. because my mom didn't manage to take home a pair of shoes from hong kong.
and yes, she promised to buy me a new pair after they arrived. so, i already had an inkling that today (Sunday) would be that day when i can finally have a new pair of shoes.

and boy, did i buy shoes.

well, for starters, my old pair of playing shoes have already worn themselves out. after 4 yrs of continuous running, jumping, diving and turning, after all the punishment i gave them every time i step on the court, a retirement is something that is worthy of the services they have given to me.

just so you know: since the last time i brought a pair of kicks, i promised myself only to have a single pair of playing shoes. so far i've been faithful to that. :D

so, here i am raving about my new shoes. well, they're Jordans. haha! finally, i now have a pair of Jordans adorning my feet!!!! though really not an Air Jordan shoe, (i was gunning for the XXIII) these are the best looking shoes i've bought. Chris Paul's signature ones. really, really nice kicks. haha! how i wish i'm as good as he is. 

i also got myself a new green nike shirt. thank you very much mom!!!! :D


P.S.
i almost forgot, today marks one year since fall out boy had their concert in Araneta. loved that day. :)

Saturday, September 20, 2008

wow. i wrote this.

What do we really want? Some of us dedicate most of their lives trying to live up to what society views them to be. For some, fulfilling this label imposed by those surrounding us is their life long dream. Who doesn't want their dreams to be fulfilled anyway? Everyday we wake up and each day brings us closer to achieving goals we have set for ourselves.. But do we really want it? Or does society require it from us? Did we really choose the path we have traveled for so long? Maybe we did it because our parents wanted us to be like this. Maybe our friends lent a hand in forming us to who we are right now, and eventually making us choose whichever path we are on right now.

Every time we watch television, go to see a movie, read a book or even hear stories from others, we avail ourselves of a chance to meet other people, other characters. They may be real, or they may be maybe not. Maybe they're just a figment of the imagination of the author, or scriptwriter, or whoever is telling the story. Whatever the source is, there will ultimately come a time where you will meet someone, real or not, who's just like you in a lot of ways. You may have a lot in common with this person, this character born out of the minds of gifted writers and storytellers.

I've known a lot of people who have already met, seen and even read about these extraordinary people. We try to be like them. Some of us already are. Some of us even share the same experiences characters endure within a movie or book's plot. We see what they see. We hear what they hear. We even feel what they felt, during that exact moment, a moment that also coincidentally happened in our own lives.

We all have a place in the world we live in. Some of us spend our entire lives looking for that place. There will be some who lose their way, and others who find it easily. Whichever case there may be, rest assured that each and everyone of us has their own place, their role in this world. Our duty then, is to make sure we know where it is, and once we get it, we make our mark. Because ultimately, we all want to leave a mark somewhere in this world. We want to be remembered, cherished and thought about even after our time has ended.

There are times when we wished we could be someone else, because our lives sucked. There are those who always get their own way, those who find a shorter way to get to where they are now, and even those who take the road less traveled.

In the movies, books, television shows and people's stories we somehow manage to find a character whom we can relate to. Someone who went through the same pains and triumphs as we did. Someone who coincidentally, had the same cards dealt by life in his or her hand as we do now. We find songs that encapsulate all of what we feel every single day. We find words that comfort us, guide us, even those that reprimand us for what we did. Somebody out there actually managed to create an object capable of bringing us back to remember something, correcting us so that we do not make the same mistakes and inspire us to do better with what we have.. Because ultimately, no matter how much alike two people are, they could never be the same. Any fictional character is eventually tied to the story he/she is in, and the burden of what they do falls on the thoughts and imagination of its creator. We makes us real people different is that, we have the ability to change, to actualize our potential. To correct mistakes that should have been committed. To be better people than we pictured ourselves to be.

People change. That I think, is humanity's most precious asset. For these characters that we find in the movies, the books and the shows we watch only present us with one of the infinitely many ways we can reinvent ourselves. They have the role of showing us what to do and what not to do. Our response here is that we don't want to be trapped in their shadows, because ultimately we can be better than who they were,

and we can do more with what we have.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

up and running

before i dive into revising my thesis' review of related literature, i would like to warm up my brain and fingers by posting a blog.

a few updates from me:
- fam's in hk right now. for 4 days. going to disneyland, stuff like that. they're with my mother's older sister and some of my cousins. i hope they manage to give in to my demands of a psp or a macbook (haha! wish ko lang di ba. kahit laptop lang na matulin to compensate for my impending pc upgrade.) though come to think of it, since i saved them a lot of money by not going with them, maybe i should renegotiate the money to become funds for my pc upgrade since i really need one more than the laptop or psp.
- why a psp now?! macbook?! i'm actually not fond of laptops. maybe its the satisfaction of getting something a wee bit faster than my pc that's forcing me to get a laptop. and for the psp, well, since bus rides and typhoons create massive traffic jams, might as well embrace upon the legions of commuters who live and die with their own psp units.
- my body hurts. recently, i played basketball so intense it left both my arms aching so much that any hint of upward movement results to me wincing in pain. the thought of having something more serious than just overstretching anything is downright scary for me. though i don't really pursue basketball as a career, i wish to take care of my body from various bumps and bruises. maybe i should get myself a regular exercise program or something. 
- i want to dispose my belly fast!!! but to do that i need to exercise.
- my brain needs exercise too.
- being alone in the house for almost 4 days can be a good awakening experience. hahaha! i suddenly have an itch to throw some kind of a house party. anyone interested please let me know. :D
- i suddenly realized that i had a lot of "bestfriends" in high school. and then i remembered how confusing my life was back then. :P
- going through old stuff with someone either makes you laugh, have a red face or reminisce. haha.
- i had too much CHIPS and CHOCOLATE this weekend. haha i don't wanna get that fat!
- Chillos.. Chillos.. Chillos.. why don't they have larger bags of these? i want a whole sack of em! now!
- i love OVERNIGHTS. haha. :D

so there you have it. i'm going to play pick-up for a while. catch you all later. peace.

Saturday, September 06, 2008

talk

oftentimes, my girlfriend and i have these days wherein we don't find ourselves doing anything. it's either we don't have money or we're just too lazy to go out and find ways to enjoy ourselves. there would be times where we would just play with our cellphone games (darn addicting games) or find some posh place, buy their cheapest item, and just sit down and chill out.

then there are times we just find our own little place in the metro. whether that be inside the school premises, or in our favorite mini-stop tambayan, and just talk. talk about anything. talk about everything. talk about things we observed, things we've seen. talk about our plans for the future, talk about what we saw on television last night, really ordinary stuff. 

we talk a lot. haha.. now that's something that came into my mind just now. i remember saying to her the other day, that even if calling her in the landlines was free of charge (because we don't have our free NDD privileges anymore) i still won't call her that often. now, don't be mad at me just yet. i can't really see the sense of talking about things we have talked about the whole day.

maybe it's my fault. i just sometimes can't think of anything else to talk about. or maybe i'm just too lazy to find about other things to talk about, since there is a whole new world still waiting for us to talkabout.

can you forgive me for that? i hope you can. :D

of course, talking has a lot of functions. you tend to get to know someone a bit more, you can learn something new, and you can effectively pass the time. 

so, whenever we're bored, we just go out to our favorite chillout space, buy something really cheap just to get good seats, and talk the day away. i love those moments. :)

Thursday, September 04, 2008

looking back.

1. the tagged victim has to come up with 8 descriptions of their perfect lover.

2. he/she must mention the sex/gender of their perfect lover.

3. he/she must tag 8 or more people to join this game and leave a comment on their page saying they've been tagged. 

4. if tagged the second time, there's no need to post again.


She must be/have...

1. i need a good conversationalist. yeah, a really good one. we should be able to talk, (err, she has to talk and talk a lot, haha, but not the nagging type) and share some things in common. i hate dull moments. being unrestrained or spontaneous is definitely a bonus. keeps me interested. 

2. full of confidence. yeah, that's what i really need right now. she's got to be the motivated and driven type of person. knows what she wants and knows how to get it. i also love laid back and relaxed girls who take their time. hahahaha!!! (contrasting, eh?)

3. a sporty person. someone who's inclined to sports. its okay to have an active lifestyle, but i sometimes get the impression that they're lesbo or something. maybe someone who's interested in sports (lalo na sa basketball! yey!) and will not yawn once i rattle off all the stats and figures that i know.

4. she MUST accept me. hahahaha!! i'm the least likeable person on Earth, but there are those select few who get past the superficial things and see the real me. and, well, they're happy they got to know me. *ehem*

5. kudos to those street smart girls. i love them!!! yah, like a girl who's got a lot of common sense, and doesn't do a lot of stupid things. never liked the "kikay" type anyway.

6. well, at least we should have ONE similar passion. say sports, music, fashion or literature. i never had a friend who didn't have the same interest such as mine (it serves as an ice breaker, mind you) so it has to be a requirement. hahahaha!!!

7. uhh, she has to be accepted by my family. i was raised with strong family ties, so if the girl can't get along with them, she's going to the pay dirt.

8. lastly, she has to possess the sweetest face i've ever seen. yes, people with those kinds of facials exist. God's such a great artist. hahahaha!!!


super retro blogpost. hehehe.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

ahhhh

nakaraos din sa presentation at midterm sa thesis!!! hahaha!!!

at sulit naman ang 1.0 para sa presentation. antayin ko na lang yung midterm ko.. hahaha!!!

ayos! :D

Saturday, August 23, 2008

wowowowow

having only about 2 days of classes should enable me to somehow have a sort of rest week.
but that was certainly not the case.

grabe eto na yata pinakanakakapagod kong linggo pagkatapos ng practicum conference!!
and still andami dami dami pang gagawin!!

kaya eto nagpapahinga na ako nitong sabado. nakanood na nga ako ng dalawang palabas na na-dl ko lang sa net.

up next: code monkeys. hahaha this should be nice. :D

p.s.
pramis magsshoot na ako BUKAS. hehehe!

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

20th of August

3 great things when there are suddenly no classes:
a. you get to not spend anything since you don't leave
b. you get an accidental break from school and a chance to do some requirements that may be rushed
c. you can just bum around for one day (something that is really cool when you are stressed from school 24/7)

but sadly, me not going to school means not being able to be with my friends. and my girlfriend.

i miss you girl..

confused

i was just wondering..

would you call your friend's boss, "boss", even though you're not working in his or her company?
would call somebody "president" or "chairman" when you are not directly affiliated nor even a member of the organization he/she currently lead?

call it OC. call it non-conformity, or even conformity in a sense. call it anything else. but hey, aren't we supposed to respect each other by referring to someone using their proper names?

so ok, everybody else calls him/her by that moniker. but haven't these people figured out that "everybody else" pertains to the actual members of the organization the he/she currently leads? then, when someone asks them to join the organization since they call him/her by this certain name, they refuse!!!

it's confusing, really. how come people bestow upon themselves the right to call someone "boss" or "chairman" if they are in fact, not actually a member of that organization and even refuse to join them??

forgive me but i believe that certain perks like calling someone "boss" are reserved for those who allot their time to really join an organization! come on, you don't call someone your "boss" unless you are employed under him or her right?

my golly, it's so confusing!

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Sayang


Isang upuan sa loob ng isang pamantasan. Para sa karamihan, ito ay napapawalang-bahala lamang. Ngunit para sa iba, ito ay isang palatandaan na may kalalagyan sila sa loob ng silid aralan.

Isipin natin, nararapat ba tayong maupo sa lugar na kinalalagyan natin ngayon? Atin bang naisasaisip at naisasapuso ang mga leksyon na matiyagang itinuturo sa atin ng mga propesor na mas maliit pa ang sweldo kesa sa isang security guard? Oo nga, lumiliban sila sa ating mga klase kung minsan dahil sa mga kalamidad tulad ng baha, trapik o kung ano pa man, pero dahil ba sa nakakaligtaan nila ang kanilang tungkulin bilang guro ay dapat na rin nating kaligtaan ang ating tungkulin bilang isang mag-aaral?

Nakakaligtaan na rin ng ating gobyerno ang kanyang tungkulin bilang isang institusyon na dapat sana ay nagbibigay sa atin ng dekalidad at murang edukasyon na maaaring makamit ng sinumang makakapasa sa mga panukatang inilatag nito. Ngunit ano ang tugon natin dito? Wala. OO, meron siguro. meron siguro pagkatapos ng quiz, ng assignment, ng mga rekisitos na binigay ni mam at ser, ng thesis, ng paper, ng recitation, pagkatapos magpahinga, kumain, magsaya, at kung ano pa man. Sayang lamang at nauwi rin sa gitna ng libro at papel ang katalinuhang inaantay sana ng bayan mong nagpaaral sa yo na gamitin para sa ikabubuti nya. ngunit sino ba ako upang pangaralan ka?

Sa mga kumikilos at ipinaglalaban ang karapatan ng ating mga kababayan, wag ninyo sanang kalimutang nag-aaral din kayo. walang makikinig sa inyo kung lahat kayo ay nasa labas ng pamantasan. sayang ang pagkakataon upang lalong matuto. OO, totoo na ang bayan at ang realidad ng buhay ay isang magandang tagapagturo, ngunit ang mga taong mismong sa pamantasan nag-aaral ay hindi nakikinig sapagkat ang respeto ay nawawala. pano nga ba makukuha ang respeto? mag-aral kayo. kunin nyo ang lugar na kinatatayuan ng isang upuan sa loob ng silid. makinig. magmatiyag. makiisa. kung tulong-tulong lang sana tayong lahat ay mas madaling makakamit ang sinasabing tagumpay.

Isang pagpupugay sa mga kabataang nag-aaral pa rin hanggang ngayon. sila na ginamit ng mahusay at mabuti ang kanilang mga upuan. sila na hindi lumiban sa klase, bagamat may isa o higit pang trabaho. sila na kahit sangkatutak na sideline na ay hindi pa rin lumiliban sa klase upang makapagturo. sila na hindi umalis sa pamantasan upang habulin ang pera sa ibang mga pamantasang lutang. sila na hindi dapat nag-aaral, ngunit ginawan pa rin ng paraan, at nagtagumpay. sa mga hindi pinalad na makapasok sa pamantasan, ngunit nagpursige pa rin at nakapag-aral, at ginamit ang natutunan para sa ikauunlad ng sarili at ng bayan, saludo ako sa inyong lahat.

ang litratong ito ay isang imahe. imahe ng isang mag-aaral na sana ay nakapasok, ngunit hindi nagawang makuha ang pagkakataong ito. imahe ng bawat mag-aaral na pinagbawalang pumasok sa pamantasan dahil walang maipambayad.

kung nakakapag-aral pa rin kayo ngayon, saludo ako sa inyo..

ang isang upuan sa loob ng isang silid-aralan ng isang pamantasang hirang. pamantasang tahanan ng giting at tapang. nawa ay maging salamin ito para sa ating lahat na nagawang maupo sa upuang ito. tanungin na natin ang ating mga sarili.

ANO NA NGA BA ANG NAGAWA KO SA PAG-AARAL KO?

Friday, August 15, 2008

change

i tried changing my blog skin to that of an xml template. but i found it too tedious to do, and i can't find any good xml skins out there.

so, back to my original skin. haha!!

looks like change is tough. :D

blog muna bago matulog

somewhere between Osborne and Gaebler's Reinventing Government and Michael Tan's articles lie three books.

Zoology.
Botany.
Biology.

welcome to medicine pare. hahaha!!

5-inch books
mitochondria
anaphases
telophases
glycocoats
and so much more!!!!

THIS IS THE LIFE! :D

(i have to sleep unless i decide not to since it would be only a few hours before i start dressing up for school.)

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

tired. again.

so much to do. period!

seriously, today's week staggers me with a lot of things to do. papers, papers and more papers. somehow the sound of eating paper entices me. basically everyone who teaches me wants to see me write a whole lot. i like to write, but come on, writing this much can be dangerous!

i haven't been this dumped on work since... since today! my gulay, this marks the first time that i will be experiencing this. if this were just EASY, then i'd probably say BRING IT ON MOTHERF&^*%ER!

but the problem is, its so god dang hard!!!
a lot of work won't be a problem if it were easy. then again, who said life was easy?

buti na lang may Folded and Hung. haha. :D

Sunday, August 10, 2008

daming gagawin

daming gagawin. pero tinatamad akong gumawa. hahaha! grabe nakakatamad. yet, kailangang gumawa dahil para sa GWA ko yun, na mahalaga sa aking pagpasok sa UP Med. hehehe!!

mamaya siguro magsisimula na ako.

andami kong gustong mabili ngayon. mag-iipon ako ng mga dalawang libong piso para pagdating ng katapusan ng Agosto, mamimili kami ng girlfriend ko. sabi ko sa kanya magtipid muna kami. at magsshopping kami! hehe masaya to. di na ako makapaghintay.

ngunit! may isang balakid..

kanina sa aking paglibot sa SM dept. store, nakakita ako ng isang laruan. hindi lamang laruan, kundi isang Stealth Bumblebee Camaro Concept type! ngayon lang ako nakakita non. at isa pa, black and gold sya! (syeeeeet) medyo nawiwili kasi ako sa black and gold ngayon. yung mga balak kong bilhin actually, puro black and gold sila. hehehe!

sa pagtatapos ng Agosto, may tatlong bagay sa aking pag-aaral na dapat nagawa o ginagawa ko na. una, ang aking thesis proposal. haha kung wala non di ako makakapagtapos, at wasak ang pangarap ko nun. pangalawa, ang journal kay Simbulan. kailanman hindi ako nakakita ng ganito ka-challenging na prof sa tanang buhay ko bilang isang mag-aaral. pero keri naman. pangatlo, ang matapos ko ang bio book na pinahiram sa akin. para sa NMAT kasi yun e. hehehe.

sabi ko pa naman sa aking mga magulang, babayaran ko agad ang telepono ko. well, babayaran ko nga sya. hindi nga lang agad. hahaha! :D

bago ko tapusin ang post na to, isang mahalagang mensahe lamang para sa mga senior citizen ng Pilipinas:
(mula sa isang jeep sa Taft)
"Student/Senior Citizen, NO DISCOUNT on WEEKENDS"

bale, nawawala pala ang pagiging senior citizen ninyo tuwing sabado at linggo. hahaha astig!

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

2 years

on august 2, 2008, my little blog turned two years old.

ayos! haha!! belated happy birthday sa blog ko. :D

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

things i got for my birthday

this isn't actually a blog about my whole birthday, but rather, of the things that i got which made the day all the more special. ahh, life is so good these days. especially when it's your birthday! haha!

a short recap of what we (that's me and me-ann) did. went to greenhills, went to the chapel, ate at CPK which had great food and service but almost ran our wallets dry. then went back to manila, had fun eating at Wendy's and Jollibee. then went home exhausted enough not to write a paper for our major. haha! we are such good students. :D
i had to ommit the tiring and annoying tasks that my mother gave me, because it made me so tired after a long but very fun day. overall, it was a day which we will remember as our "try ou something new" day. haha!


sorry if i had talked a little bit. now, without further ado, here are the things i received for my birthday.

in no particular order:
1. a Nike Basketball shirt - my golly! i didn't really expect receiving this on my birthday. i remember that feeling of being overcome by surprise and amazement because somehow i ended up having a shirt that i've been wanting to buy for a long, long time! haha!!

see!?! such a very good looking tshirt! hahaha!! :D

2. Air Jordan handtowel - another gift that caught me by surprise!!! grabe, na
windang ako nung nakuha ko to! akalain mo yun may twalya palang ganun?! hahaha!!
!
oha. sarap nyang tignan lang. parang ayoko nang gamitin. hahaha!! :P

3. A4tech in-ear bass boosting earphones - a gift for myself actually. i bought it in VMall, because they are the only ones selling these at very cheap prices. (370php compared to 600php at MoA! jeez). a long time after my original A4techs broke down, i was on the verge of giving up on finding a replacement. luckily, one family trip to greenhills changed that. i promised myself to buy this on my birthday which i did.
its actually silver by the way, which fits my ipod's color. niiiiiice. :D

4. her - she's not actually a thing. well, duh. but i really, really consider her a something of a gift to me. ever since she's been in my life, everything's come up in roses (which have thorns, so its not a perfect life you know) and well, life doesn't suck anymore. she also gave me items number 1 and 2 so really, i do have a lot of thanking to do. THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR EVERYTHING! you made this all possible. hehehe!!!
biased ano? hahaha! ganun talaga. salamat ng marami!! xoxo

some other things i got for my birthday:
- a new phone (from my parents, which i intend to pay with my own money)
- a toy soldier from Cams. thanks a lot Cams! am now trying to find more ways to make him dance. haha!
- a card from my sister. really good stuff. kikay and all, but hey, its the thought that counts!!
- a teddybear from me-ann. haha di na talaga pinansin ano? kasi naman yung tshirt kinuha yung atensyon ko! hahaha!!!

so there! thus ends my (post)birthday entry!!!! peace on Earth! :P


Monday, July 28, 2008

happy birthday!

YES! BENTE NA AKOOOO!!!


hindi muna ako magbblog ngayon. andami pang ginagawa e!!! pakswet na skul yan! XD

Sunday, July 27, 2008

125

post number 125. yeboy.

in a few hours it would already be the 28th of July. PGMA's State Of the Nation Address would begin in the afternoon. maybe around 2pm. well, i'm just juggling it in my head. i really don't know what time it would actually begin.

what i do know is, i'll be turning 20 by then.
new phone (which i bought with my own money. using credit cards i call my parents. haha!)
new life
new year
new attitude?!?

somehow i've gotten the urge to bring something new to the table. do things i haven't done. palibasa bente na. hahaha!!!!

no one dare piss me off tomorrow. i'll be somewhere in the metro celebrating with my girlfriend. so there. :D

Saturday, July 12, 2008

birthday

excited.
anxious.
nervous.

yes this is me two weeks before my 20th. ;)

Thursday, July 03, 2008

at last

we're finished. well, i was supposed to write this after the conference, but i was so dog-tired and sleeping was the best thing to do after that.

it was a very stark revelation for all of us. especially for me, as being the one in charge for practically everything, i got to see who can do what and who was willing to do it.

it was surprising for me to know my blockmates better, and to see who were the ones that i can place under the "nuances" column. please, i hope that your incompetence only victimized OUR event, and not the other "things" which rank of higher importance in your life.

in behalf of everyone, i am extending my deepest and sincerest apologies to all of those whose time got wasted (and some who dared not waste their time at all) by our event. and if you have something to say, just be sure that its worth saying. don't give me useless shit and criticism which i cannot use and which i cannot fathom where it came from. so there.

and so continues my very active senior year. damn, if i was this active in high school, what could have happened to me? what type of person would i become now? guess i'm about to find out. :P

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Aang, Magnifico and so much more.

Last Sunday, i managed to catch the last few minutes of Magnifico, starring Jiro MaƱo. I was able to watch it from the time he died up to his funeral. to my disbelief, tears started to well up in my eyes. I was surprised of course, but somehow Magnifico managed to tug that little string in my heart which is connected to my perceptions of death. As the movie went on, i asked questions to my sisters about the preceding events, on why Jiro's character was beloved by so many, on what he did in the movie and all that jazz.

somehow looking into his bright, lively little eyes (which are not so little anymore. binatilyo na e.) made me realize how much pain such untimely demise may cause to his immediate family. and fair enough, everyone was crying and sobbing. Magnifico made me realize one thing, death definitely is something anyone should not take for granted.

death is like a thief in the night. sometimes you know someone's coming, other times you're just caught off-guard. the untimeliness of death, and the concept of finiteness in life that it embodies makes me think. how would i be when someone really close to me dies?

the closest person whose death affected me was that of a neighbor of ours who was also someone who i played basketball with. our whole place was in disarray that fateful day. some aura of sadness which gripped our place and left suddenly without a trace. a lot of us still remember him, but somehow our place has managed to move on. but i don't know if his fiance and his sons have accepted that fact or not.

personally, i think i'm still not able to handle this concept of death. i'm older now, which means the old people are older too, and the young people then are not so young anymore. the thrill and exuberance of youth slowly ebbs away, and in the end, we all return to where we came. on an emotional and psychological level, death really takes a toll. the human spirit wavers whenever a kin passes away. also, the timing of death is something which should be taken into account. untimely ones are definitely hard to swallow, though some are ready to face their maker.

i had a dream some time ago, which brought me to some pristine beach. and all of my relatives and family members were still young and full of life. from my vantage point, i see myself as a little 2-year old boy, and then i realized i was looking at a moving picture of my father's family and our little outing when i was a little kid. then a voice called out to me, telling me that i should make the most out of the time, because one day all of them will disappear. i really cried in that dream. a nightmare i think. but somehow it instilled into me something which other people take for granted. the gift of life.

people should be thankful of the presence of others in their lives. it is they who comprise who and what you are now. we should all feel blessed.

...

i just finished watching Avatar: The Last Airbender. Aang and Company have managed to keep me awake till 3am for the past two days, and i thoroughly enjoyed watching their adventures. At last an American cartoon worth of my time. Not since the days of X-Men, Spiderman and Iron Man was i able to enjoy US made toons. I've been tracking Avatar for like, two years and was really planning to watch it from beginning to end, but i don't have trust in dvds which have a tendency to skip. thank goodness for the people at watchavatartv.com which made the episodes from Book 1 to the latest in Book 3 available. Avatar is like Full Metal Alchemist on steroids: less seriousness, more fight. But that doesn't make it a boring show. the plot and the mythos included in the series is a vast one to behold. i can't wait to see it come full circle.

if there's one thing Aang taught me while watching him and his companions kick the crud out of the opposition is that, there are many ways to hurt a person, yet there are many more ways to protect that person. Avatar is full of little gems in life which put it into perspective especially to those people who are confused (take note of Zuko, the fire prince) and to those who want to appreciate life, liberty and love a little bit more.

then there's the part where Aang kicks serious butt through the Avatar state. and there's the bender battles. really good stuff. haven't had this much fun since watching Eureka Seven which FINALLY has a movie coming up. please don't screw this up BONES animation. we love you.

p.s.
NARUTO: SHIPPUDEN SUCKS.
they're making a complete cash cow of it. with a length rivaling that of dragonball z and maybe even doraemon! WTF. i don't make out the rationality of creating a filler season when there's so much manga to cover.

p.p.s.
well, it's back to Sgt. Keroro then! time to laugh once more. :)



Saturday, June 14, 2008

things that i noticed

i seriously have a lot of downloading to do. meanwhile, as my broadband connection suffers due to the influx of bytes into the pc, i sit in front of my pc typing an update on my web log.

fortunately for me, i do not have the insanity to simultaneously download all of the shit i want at the same time. not like someone i know who had their workstations crash and have hardware failures because of too much multi-tasking. a computer can only do so much.

so please, have pity in your machines. they have limitations too you know.

thunderstorms have been the rage in my place this week. it has been twice already that loud and gangly sounds of thunder and flashes of lightning have drowned the sound my pc makes and that of the tv. not that i'm afraid of thunder, well a lot of kids were, including me. although i grew out of it like with my fear of firecrackers. i think it really comes with age. you grow up, then you notice that you don't need to be overly afraid of things, though you do need to be careful with what you do.

school's already started. i already have my thesis topic. my, my, my. i hope i do finish it. and besides, i do have a lot of inspiration and prodding to draw out from (naks naman.)

at last i now have a car. well, i just inherited it from my father. i take it for a ride once in a while. i'm still thinking if i could bring it to school (and start a carpool or something. haha). but since then my appreciation for cars has flourished. well, i've come to appreciate it thanks to my friend Miko who had his OJT at Nissan. hawa-hawa na lang e. nagsimula sa NFS tapos ngayon sa kotse na talaga.

somehow i too want to trick out my car. maybe i will someday. maybe sooner if i win the lottery. :P

coming into my college years, i've noticed that my command for language has come up a notch. well, maybe a little bit. i can now write decently in both English and Filipino, and i don't really need music anymore to make my mind work. so now my reading and writing setups both require silence and order to function.

so there, a little update on a few things.
damn it i want siopao right now. i need like, two pieces!!! :D


Tuesday, May 27, 2008

quite frank, but not really.

two years ago, only two things mattered to me. my computer and basketball.
take one out, and my whole life fishtails. i panic. i become washed out. i become kind of crazy in a very ugly sort of way. in short it's not really good to deprive me of my only joys. i become a monster when one fails me, and people have suffered because of this. (haha! maybe an exaggeration on my part. but it has its effects nevertheless.)

i really wasn't into girls. not my thing. although a lot of people mistake me for being a playboy. (something which i can perceive either as an insult or a complement, depending on my mood)

my life was simple. get to college. become a doctor. upgrade my pc. become a better ball player. after that, well, i haven't thought about that..



then she came.


this one is for you my dear.



love is a like a free lance (to borrow from Eureka7), it either hurts you or it makes you stronger. depends really on the user to which target he/she wants to point the lance on. sadly for me, my first few brushes with this lance resulted to grave injuries. something that made it hard for me to recover from. it was very idealistic, really. i was loving a person so much but was not given as much recognition as needed.

as a result, it ended badly with me getting slashed (or hurt, or whatever)
for me, my motto back then was: "better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all"

then she came.

i never really wondered how movie romance works. i suppose they put two different people and let the circumstances work themselves out until they fall in love and ride into the sunset. then they stick the destiny, fate, or meant to be something label and it stops there. a movie has a definite ending. no one really wonders what happens to boy and girl after they stop reading the script. unless the movie studio decides making a sequel.

hey, my life isn't a movie. it ain't perfect and it definitely still has no ending. but somehow after she came, i started believing the whole destiny, fate or meant to be concepts that movie directors and scriptwriters are so adept of using.

i still can't believe it. really. no matter what way i stack the precedence of the events that happened between us, it still fits the same perfect picture.

so this is what they call dream-like. its like a dream, but it's real. like a movie set in reality.
you see, she was too good to be true.

every little thing, every bit of what she does and what she is, actually fits to what i like. no, not like, more like love.. yeah, i love everything that she does.

and now here we are. stuck in our half-real/half-movie like lives. still very happy. still very much in love. still enjoying each other's company to the fullest. still doing a lot of things. still going out on adventures. still dating. still living our lives one day at a time. savoring life, and what it has to offer.

no, we don't have everything up by the roses. we fight. we argue. but in the end, we temper each other out. we understand. we forgive. then we get to the fun part again.

but maybe the best part of it is that we love.
and we bring out the best of each other. (hopefully. haha.)

somewhere in the back of my mind i still wonder how someone becomes this happy. then i realized, not only did i love, but i was loved. by the person most perfect to do it.

this time, it wasn't a matter of finding the perfect love, but finding the person that will love you perfectly.

when that happens.. the eyes glitter, the hearts beat faster, the mind flutters, a smile is etched unto your face. and you can't really help but be happy, coz somehow someone found you, and liked what they saw.

magical isn't it? i still can't believe it myself.
she, does things that i realized were things that i really, really liked.
she, sees me as i am. and accepts what i am not.
she, understands me at a level no one else does..

in the middle of these words is a happy child content of what he has..
a hand that fits his hand perfectly.
a smile that makes him smile as well.
a presence that makes him feel good of what he is and what he has done.

and finally..

a love tried and tested, a love that has persevered.

she, is a blessing to my life.
she, is the reason i wrote this. :)


Monday, May 26, 2008

bleep bleep

FRUSTRATING!
ANNOYING!!!
IRRITATING!
HAIR RAISING!!!

my gulay! sa dinami-dami ng araw!!!!!!!!!!! kunwari lang pala na tapos na kami. bad trip. diyos ko day! XD

Monday, May 19, 2008

after 33 days of practicum...

I'M BACK.

do i have to say anything else? :P

Sunday, April 13, 2008

wishes

in a few days time i will be hiking off to Pangasinan for one month, in which our team of three is expected to integrate itself into the lifestyles of our fellow Filipinos who have it hard. Living in the provinces hasn't been much of a problem for me, but i'm really curious of what may happen to my other classmates who have no idea what the rough life is. the best of luck to them. and to us as well. we'll need everything to come up with a comprehensive report to do our job. i hope we do just fine. anything that we may accomplish i hope can be of help to the people who we would be living with.

now, back to my real blog topic. wishes. not that i'm going to talk about wishes per se. i'm just going to have a wishlist. a lifetime wishlist if you may. certain events, and maybe certain items. this marks the first time that i will be going to make a list of such, and publish it in the net. but don't get me wrong, i've long kept a list of things to buy every semester since my 2nd year. these things i hope i can buy, or experience in my lifetime.

here they go! (in no order. well, that is, they are the first to pop out of my mind.)

1. Sony Ericsson's W890i
- the first time i saw this phone, it was absolute love at first sight. i just saw the dummy phone last Thursday. By Saturday, the Sony Ericsson branch at Rob Manila already had their stocks, although they were not sure of the pricing. I even had the chance to test out one. It was the best phone i've ever touched! 2GB memory stick + 30MB of phone mem + 3.2MP camera and then the Walkman feature made me want so much to escape the mall with the phone in my hands. haha.. i'll have this shit after prac. if not, i'd settle for either the w880i or the w660i handsets.

SM Bacoor already has stocks of it.
TAG PRICE: P17,500

2. a digital camera
- preferably, maybe the Sony Cybershot or the Canon Ixus series. not really wanting the expensive ones, those with like manually adjusted lenses. a decently priced digital camera with an internal battery, small enough to be in my pocket, has all the basic features, plus those adjustable shutter speeds and then i'd be happy. i think a lot of shots that i've wanted to take need those precise shutter speeds so there.

i don't really see myself being able to buy one, but if anyone wants to give me a digital camera, then i'd be thankful. :)

3. closet full of Nikes.
- people close to me may know how much of a Nike freak i am. (or maybe people who are really close to me.) i'd like a closet full of 'em, like shirts, jerseys, shorts, even the pants they sell. plus about 4 to 5 pairs of sneakers. i'm not really much of a sneaker head. maybe just 2 pairs of casual shoes and a pair of basketball shoes could do the trick.

speaking of pants...

4. Levi's-Jordan limited edition pants
- super collector's item is what they say. come on, a Levi's red tag pair of jeans with a Jordan brand stitched on them? my goodness

5. a pair of Nike Air Jordans
- if i only had one pair of playing shoes in my closet, this has to be it. Any kind of Jordan. from I to XX3. but i prefer the Jordan XX's. or even the XIV's.

6. a Rolex watch.
- nothing really makes a man more than the watch he wears. and wearing a Rolex basically means you've made it. it also makes you a very suitable target for snatchers.

TAG PRICE: i don't really wanna puke when i see a price tag of a Rolex watch in pesos. so i won't look. :P

7. become a doctor from UP-PGH.
- the one thing which may be the undisputed greatest wish of mine. of course i don't expect it being handed to me in a platter. i'll have to work my damn ass off for this. but i know, once i get that M.D. in my name, heck, even just the nameplate, i think i'm going to be the happiest person alive.

for me this is the culmination of my single, solitary dream since childhood. the road i take is very much different from others, which can be my greatest asset. the journey to which i travel has made me more definitely sure that i wanted to become a doctor and serve my fellow countrymen. at dapat sa UPCM ako. hindi pwede sa iba. it's all in my hands. kaya yan. ako pa. hahaha. :P

8. build my own house
- well, not construct it on my own. i just want to be a proud owner of my own house. i'd be canvassing the plot of land where my house would be built, then i'd have it constructed using my own resources. a simple 2-story house would be nice.

i don't want to put up a house in tagaytay. a lot of land there has already been wasted due to worthless land conversion initiatives. this should be stopped.

9. have a family, and a loving wife of course.
- pretty self-explanatory. haha. :)

10. build my dream pc.
- i need an upgrade of my pc now. since having Windows Vista i have seen how far back my pc is. i want the high end ones. but not really that extravagantly priced. you know, just right for the money.

my dream pc should be like (in today's standards, because tech moves at such a fast rate that 2 years from now these specs would be slower by that day's standards)

-intel quad core processor (or maybe dual-core if we can't afford it)
- nvidia gforce 8800 712MB GPU
- 2GB corsair ddr2 5200 ram
plus the old parts of my cpu, which i love (the blue diodes are sooo cooool) :P

maybe i'd like to have the water-powered cooling system. or the liquid nitrogen ones. lol.




so there. this concludes my wishlist for now. maybe i'll add something else. maybe not. :)

Friday, April 04, 2008

am i ranting? i hope not.

"talaga?"

"weh, di nga?"

"no stir tsong?"

"ang KJ mo naman!"

"totoo ba talaga yan?"

...

enumerated above are exasperated expressions from people around me. Classmates, friends, cousins, former classmates (high school), and maybe more. try bringing me to a neighborhood inuman and you'll see the little known fact about me that drives these dumbfounded exclamations.

I DON'T DRINK. PERIOD.

no, not drinking water and other fluids per se. don't be stupid. what i don't drink is alcohol, and other drinks that people prohibit you when you are young, or in the case of the US, something that is worth getting a fake ID for.

i remember when i was in elementary, the craze when you're young was Cali Shandy. semi-alcohol. it's like the tutorial for drinking beer. it's got a little alcohol content on it, but not in massive amounts like beer. i heard from my friends that it still had a kick (or maybe because we were little kids back then. grade 5 isn't really old you know), and it was a very enjoyable drink.

when i entered college, i presumed that maybe the majority of people in my school drink. and i wasn't wrong. clubs flanked our campus (i study in Malate for crying out loud) and getting a drink was a few steps away. but i wasn't really into this drinking until my classmates started organizing these forays into clubs. it was like a drinking session for the whole block. unfortunately, i only drank water and softdrinks (and a little iced tea) the whole time. people didn't really notice it, since we were like so many (around 20 something).

the time when my non-alcoholism really went into the spotlight was when we were invited into this drinking session at my former classmate's house (name withheld), organized by my current blockmate (name also withheld) because my current blockmate has been experiencing problems of the heart (love for the stupid man who cannot decipher what i am saying).

so there we were, the six of us, minus me of course, who were drinking. since we were really few, my former classmate really tried his best to persuade me to drink. his efforts were vain of course. but this time, they turned on to my girlfriend (who likes to drink by the way), and well, she refused the first time, thinking what might happen if she drinks in front of me. after much prodding however, i relented. the night was one of the most unforgettable nights of my life. in a lot of ways good, and then some bad.

bad. i don't smoke, i don't drink, i don't gamble. practically i don't have vices. if basketball were a vice then that may be my vice. but i don't really engage myself in items which have a "sin tax" on them.

maybe it's really selfish in my part to prohibit someone from enjoying something that she likes to do. but then again, i really hate drinkers. i remember nights when my dad comes home to the house then pukes on the toilet because he was so drunk. thankfully that's over. i remember being texted by someone who was so drunk that she threatened to slash herself because a certain boy did not appease to her feelings (the boy was definitely not me), and the bad part was that in that certain time i was pursuing her. people do a lot of crazy shit when they are drunk. maybe i can attest to some good things crazy people do. but other than that, nah, crazy shit. either being silent or very audacious, wailing and walking in a very unbalanced manner. it would be a really great idea if i had a video camera with me then i'd record the shit they do. but then i'm not a person who would go out of his way to abuse one's alcoholism and ruin their day afterwards.

i don't try to pull off the image of a holy man for not having any vices. it's just that i don't like partaking in activities like that. and the fact that i am allergic to them (tobacco and alcohol) makes me more comfortable in staying as the way i am.

although a dilemma strikes me. do i pursue the selfishness of mine and forbid a person very dear to me from enjoying happiness or do i let the person be? then i'd deal with what happens later. it's still a big problem to me. something that moves me to tears while thinking about it on the bus. haha emote emote pa no?

i'm still buying to the idea of talking to my mom. i don't really know what would happen if i break down in front of her, but maybe she'll be able to talk sense into my head.

or maybe i should just follow suit and drink? nah, not really my style of coping.

Friday, March 28, 2008

blog roll

kagabi ko pa gustong magblog. tinamad lang ako kakanood ng nba at kasi kating-kati na ako maglaro. hehehe. adik na uli ako sa dungeon siege 2. tapusin ko muna yun bago ko i download yung expansion pack. hehe parang low res na granado espada lang, although limited lang yung classes. tsaka natutuwa ako kasi kada palit ng equips nakikita sa character. parang diablo. hehehe..

kamakailan sabi ng girlfriend ko (nakanang may girlfriend na! haha), nationalistic daw ako. hahaha.. di ko alam kung bakit, pero sang-ayon naman ako sa sinasabi nya. mas may pakialam na ako ngayon sa nangyayari di tulad nung hayskul ako na parang tanga lang. haha.. gusto ko rin na lumabas na ang totoo. gusto ko rin na magkaroon ng kontribusyon patungo sa makabuluhang pagbabago. at gusto kong maging doktor upang magpagaling ng tao at siguruhin na ang lahat ng pasyenteng dadaan sa akin ay may mataas na antas ng kalusugan.

bakit ba ako naging ganito? siguro dahil na rin sa kurso ko at sa pinapasukan kong pamantasan. malaki rin pala ang dulot ng academic freedom sa isang mag-aaral. nagagawa kong makipagsapalaran at makakuha ng ibang ideya mula sa iba't ibang mga katauhan. marami na akong natutunan, pero sabi nga ng isa kong propesor, napakarami pang pwedeng matutunan sa mundo. kaya ngayon nasa yugto ako ng pagpapalawak ng aking mga interes. tambay tambay na sa lib, hanap ng librong pwedeng basahin. nahihilig na ako ngayon sa linguistics at kay Jung. pero di pa ako nakakahanap ng free time tumambay sa lib. siguro next year.

napansin kong tagalog na ang madalas na gamit ko tuwing magbblog. dulot na rin siguro to ng pagiging patriotiko ko. di pa naman nawawala ang kakayahan kong magsulat sa ingles (patunay ay ang 1.0 na nakuha ko sa aking paper na ipinost ko rito kamakailan) at wala akong balak iwala yun. siguro depende na lang sa aking mood ngayon kung anong lenggwahe ang mas pinipili kong gamitin upang ihayag ang damdamin ko. kaya eto tagalog na ulit. hehehe..

so ayan, malapit na pala ang practicum namin. masayang karanasan to. sana maging maayos ang lahat.


aba! nakakatatlong post na pala ako. hehe, kaya nga blog roll pangalan nitong post na to e. :P

something to ponder upon

Of all the ideas that became the United States, there's a line here that's at the heart of all the others. "But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and provide new Guards for their future security."

- Ben Gates (National Treasure)

?!

ilan sa mga bagay na aking napansin nitong mga nakaraang araw:

1. meron tayong rice shortage. oo tama rice shortage. sa isang bansang agrikultural tulad natin. nakakatawa. at naglalaan ang ating gobyerno ngayon ng P60 billion para sa bigas!! aangkatin ito mula pa sa vietnam kung saan ang mga dalubhasa ay dumayo pa sa Pilipinas upang mag-aral ukol sa advanced farming and argicultural methods. nakakahiya!

2. meron din palang mga hardcore na tibak na patron din ng Starbucks at Mcdonalds. ok na yung nagsusuot sila ng havaianas eh, pero maging patron ng Mcdo at Starbs? baka hindi kasama sa pinaglalaban nila yung komersyalisasyon ng pagkain. masyado yata silang busy ipaglaban yung pagtaas ng tuition. pero di mo rin naman masisisi yung mga yon, nagugutom din naman sila tulad natin. split level activism ba ito?

3. nakakatuwang ginawa ang Saligang Batas na naglalaman ng kolektibong kagustuhan ng taumbayan, pero may sapat na "leg room" pa rin ito upang mailiko at maabuso ng mga taong nasa kapangyarihan. (tulad ng isang unano dyan sa Malakanyang)

4. may kakayahan din palang mag-number 1 ang mga kanta ni erik santos at kung sinu-sino pang mga dating kalahok ng mga singing contest sa MTV. (pagbaba ng quality standard? haha)



sa kabuuan, masasabi kong bumababa na ang estado ng lipunan dito sa ating bayan. marami pang magagawa. simulan na natin ngayon.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

hindi ko alam ang ipapamagat ko rito

nagbblog ako ngayon. maraming dahilan kung bakit, well, bukod sa hindi ako nakakain ng tokwa ngayong semana santa (hehe :P) e dahil ginawa namin ang taunang "visita iglesia" namin.

kala ko noon 14 dapat na simbahan ang dapat mong puntahan. pero pito lang pala dapat. ayon ito sa pitong katedral na nasa landas papuntang Roma noong Middle-Ages. kasi bawat taong nagnanais magpanata e dadaan muna sa pitong simbahan at magninilay sa harapan ng "blessed sacrament" ng simbahan. hindi pala yung Stations of the Cross yung bida. hehe.. pero dahil napapaloob na ito sa kulturang Pilipino ngayon, sikat na ang 14 na Istasyon ng Krus ni Hesukristo.

masarap ang bisita iglesia dahil para amin, ito ay part nature-trip at part religious activity. at ito rin ang isang araw sa buong taon na ako ay nakakabalik sa aking dating high school. kasi yun ay pinapatakbo ng mga pari, kaya may bisita iglesia rin sila sa chapel kung saan apat na taon din kaming nakilahok sa mga pangrelihiyosong gawain.

marami akong nagunita noong panahong iyon na nagbibisita kami. malaki na rin pala ang pinagbago ko simula noong nagtapos ako sa mataas na paaralan. naisip kong nakakatuwa sigurong magkita kami ng aking sarili noong mga panahon ng high school. ano kaya mapapag-usapan namin? parang tanga lang siguro yun na kausap ko ang sarili ko. pero sa tingin ko, kung nagkausap kami, marami akong ipapayo sa kanya. para matuwid yung mga kalokohan ko sa buhay. para maayos nya yung pag-aaral nya ng 3rd yr dahil dun pala nakasalalay yung UP application ko. haha sana nasa mabilis na daan ako tungo sa medisina. kaso mukhang hindi ganun ang gusto ng tadhana para sa akin. hindi ko naman sinisisi yun, dahil totoo namang marami akong natutunan, nakilala at nakita sa kakaibang daan na binigay sa akin ng tadhana.

kahit ano pa man ang mangyari, pagkatapos ng lahat ay magiging doktor pa rin ako na produkto ng Pamantasan ng Pilipinas-Kolehiyo ng Medisina. haha.

sa kabuuan ng bisita iglesia, nakapagnilay ako sa mga ginawa ko noong mga panahong iyon, mga dalawang taon na halos ang nakakaraan. alam siguro ng iba ang tinutukoy ko. iyon nga yun. hehehe. mahirap pala ang makalimot. mahirap din ang gawin ang lahat ng iyong makakaya na sa bandang huli ay mauuwi rin sa wala. mahirap mapaniwalaan na nangyari ang lahat ng iyon, dumating at nawala, nang hindi ko nalalaman ang dahilan kung bakit kailangan mangyari yun.

sabi ko nga, hanggang ngayon naiisip ko pa rin kung para saan ang karanasang iyon. hindi ko pa rin yata nakukuha ang aral nun.

maraming salita.
maraming luha.
maraming oras.

sadyang napakalaki na pala ng naipundar ko sa relasyon naming dalawa. pero ang konti pa lang naman ng panahong lumipas. apat na taon pa lang. o lima? hindi ko na rin alam.

kaarawan ngayon ng taong mahal ko. pagkakataon upang mapakita ko kung gaano sya kahalaga sa akin.


pagkakataon para masabi kong napakasaya ng buhay na andyan sya.
(biglang kambyo ang pinagsasabi ko ngayon no? ganun talaga.)

Saturday, March 15, 2008

weirdo sila

had a great day today. me-ann and I went mall hopping, sale kasi. nakabili ako ng bagong denim jeans. wala na kasi akong jeans e, 3 pares lang meron ako tapos hirap pa magrotate ng damit. hehe ayoko magslacks andali kasi marumihan. i liked the pair that i brought, soft yung tela sarap nung fit sa binti. plus its just 400 pesos. i hated bench for having overly priced jeans, thank goodness for sales.

kaya sabi ko sa sarili ko, tuwing sale lang ako bibili ng pantalon. kasi sa bench lang ako nabili. (may naligaw na human na jeans kasi nga ang mamahal ng bench.)

many people do not know that I only stick to certain brands. really, tignan nyo yung mga damit ko at mga gamit sa bahay. hehe.. brand conscious ako. i even collect their tags (something that i don't do anymore due to lack of space to put them in)

bakit nga ba? di naman sa nagpapakasosy ako. sabi nga sa klase namin bentahe ng brand name ang panagutan ang kalidad ng kanilang binebentang produkto . if a brand establishes itself as a high quality brand (i.e. nike) then we can say that every other item associated or made under this brand can be expected to be of high class production. that's what's up with brands. i look for quality in what i use, plus i'm too lazy to memorize my sizes on different brands and it's too tedious to fit every single item i'm going to buy. saves me the hassle finding the right size for myself. i can just go in their store, and when i see something that may be worth buying, i just ask my size. no need to make tedious fittings.

so there, a little bit of trivia for people who don't know me yet manage to find my blog.

back to what i was supposed to type, i find some things about people which are weird.
things like:
- going inside the mall when the sign clearly reads EXIT
- going through the male line when they are actually females (not gays mind you)

these two things i often observe of people going to malls. are they stupid? or are they just itching to go inside the mall that they disregard the dignity that they have and embarrass themselves in front of people?

siguro kasi sale kaya nagmamadali. pero kakaiba pa rin. antatanda pa naman nila. at marami sila. wala man lang nakahalata na mali yung lugar na pinapasukan nila.

yun lang. hehe. may cable tv na kami. oye oye. :)

blog muna

rambol rambol siguro tong post na to. hehehe.. anyway, kakatapos lang ng pag gawa ko ng mga bagay. bale ang natitira na lang siguro ay:
- hum2 na exam ko
- results ng exam kay doc ed. na magdidikta kung babalik pa ba ako ng skul pagkatapos ng holy week.
- curriculum vitae (hindi talaga nauubos ang gawain kay sir john)

ayan na lang siguro. looking forward to my vacation. kahit maikli lang yun, tas practicum na. ok lang. at least eventful ang summer ngayon. kaso di ako makakanood ng NBA playoffs. asar naman yun. hahaha..

grabe talaga ang mundo ng pulitika. sa dami ng taong involved na gustong makakuha ng pwesto sa konseho, ayun andaming pinag gagawa. ay nako, sakit ng ulo.

answerte pala talaga ni GMA. ayaw talaga syang matanggal sa MalacaƱang. ipa assassinate na lang kasi yan. tas DCG na. hahaha!!!

ayun lang. para naman maupdate yung blog ko para sa mga taong dumadaan dito sa aking site.

p.s.
sa sinumang may alam kung san makakakuha ng kopya ng And1 mixtape tour (kahit anong volume), mangyari lamang na kontakin ako. hehe. :)

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

three things

medyo may sakit ako ngayon e. napasobra ang singhot ko ng alikabok kaya ayun nagkasinusitis ako.
sakit sa ulo. hehe tulo pa ng tulo yung mga bagay sa ilong ko. kailangan ko na rin pala magpahinga. pero update muna.

nga pala, salamat kay me-ann para sa cap na bigay nya. ang ganda talaga ng cap. nag abala ka pa talaga no? hahaha! salamat ulit! :)

tatlong bagay lang ang pagtutuunan ko ng pansin dito.

1. freedom wall ng UP
- aminado akong isa ako sa mga tumutuligsa sa freedom wall ukol sa mga nakasulat/likha na napapaloob dito. at dahil dito ay samu't saring mga reaksyon ang nakuha ko, kesyo raw karapatan naman daw nila ang iensayo ang kanilang kalayaan sa pagpapahayag.

medyo napaisip ako, siguro nga ganun iyon, pero may mali talaga sa ginagawa nila. hindi ko malaman kung ano ito, hanggang sa isang araw nakita ko sa akda ng isang librong nabasa ko ang mga salitang ito..

"freedom is only a negative aspect of a whole phenomenon whose positive aspect is RESPONSIBILITY. Freedom degenerates into an arbitrary agent once it is lived beyond the lines of responsibility. As with the United States of America, I propose a Statue of Responsibility as a counterpart of the Statue of Liberty."

sa wakas. ngayon medyo alam ko na ang kulang sa freedom wall natin. ito ay ang responsibilidad. responsable bang paggamit ng kalayaan sa paghahayag ang paghahanap ng textmate sa pamamagitan ng pagsulat ng numero ng iyong cellphone sa freedom wall? gamitin naman natin sa wasto at responsableng paraan ang ating kalayaan mga taong nagsusulat sa freedom wall. wag nating hayaang bumaba ang grado ng responsibilidad at kalayaan sa ating pamantasan.

2. jun lozada
- pareho kami nung pamangkin ni ruthy. masakit na ang ulo ko ke jun lozada. wala man syang pakialam ukol sa kanyang "celebrity" status ay tila sinasamba sya ng mga taong sumusuporta sa kanya.

tama lang siguro na sabihing isa sya sa may hawak ng susi upang malaman ang buong pangyayari. tama lang siguro na mag-ikot sya sa mga paaralan upang ipaliwanag ng husto ang tanong at haka-haka na namuo sa mga kaisipan ng taumbayan ngayon.

pero, sa sympo na tinampukan ni lozada na aking nadaluhan ay napansin kong tinatanong sya ng mga tao roon kung ano ang dapat bang gawin ng taumbayan, kung ano ba ang dapat gawin para umunlad ang Pilipinas at kung ano ba ang dapat gawin upang lumabas ang katotohanan.

hindi ko lang alam ah, pero parang mali yata kayo ng taong tinatanungan.

siguro may punto ang kasama ko nung sinabi nyang gusto lang marinig ng tao ang pananaw ni lozada tungkol sa mga ganoong bagay, pero dapat sigurong alalahanin natin na naging prominente lamang si lozada sa kanyang paghahayag ukol sa mga anomalya sa ZTE broadband deal. hindi po sya isinugo ng Diyos para sabihin sa atin ang dapat gawin upang umunlad ang Pilipinas.

nagtataka lang ako, bakit nga ba tayo may National Broadband deal samantalang hindi naman 1:1 ang ratio ng tao sa computer dito sa ating bansa? hindi naman lahat ng tao ay may access sa mga teknolohiyang ito. mas abala pa sila sa pag iisip kung paano maitatawid ang kanilang pamilya mula sa gutom sa araw-araw na pamumuhay. anlabo nga naman o.

3. campus politics
- sa buong buhay ko sa UP, ngayong 3rd Yr lang ako nakialam sa napakagandang mundo ng pulitika sa pamantasan. dahil nalalapit na ang eleksyon sa UP, narito at nagkalat na naman ang mga kandidato.
ang aking reaksyon sa karamihan sa kanila ay:
"wow, tatakbo pala tong taong ito. ano kaya ang plataporma nya?"

karamihan sa mga poster nila ay hindi naglalaman ng kahit ano bukod sa kanilang pangalan, partidong kinabibilangan at posisyong tatakbuhan. nitong linggong to lang nagkaroon ng mga "kakaunting pagpapahiwatig ng kanilang plataporma" na nakalagay sa kanilang mga posters. (na nagkataon namang huling linggo na ngayon ng kampanya dahil march 7 na ang eleksyon)

kakulangan ba to sa RTR nila? siguro kailangan ko nang puntahan yung miting de avance ng CAS para naman may ideya pa ako kung anong pakulo meron ang mga kandidato ngayong taon.

kanya-kanyang raket. kanya-kanyang papansin. kanya-kanyang pauso. kanya-kanyang pabango. kanya-kanyang sabuyan ng baho. dirty tactics. election protests. di pa kasama dyan ang mababang voter turnout sa pamantasan (na sa aking palagay ay nasa 45-50% lamang.)

ok to a. pareho lang din halos ang pulitika sa national level at sa campus level. sayang, kala ko medyo iba pagdating sa campus level eh. hindi rin pala. ay, siguro ang pagkakaiba lang dito, di masyadong malaki yung perang nadadamay. pero may pera pa rin. bale magkapareho pa rin sila. ay ano ba talaga?! naguguluhan na ako.

Thursday, February 28, 2008

paper ko sa hum2

nasiyahan akong gumawa ng paper kaya eto ipopost ko rin dito para masaya. :D

Man’s Search for Meaning

For many of us, deep contemplation of our humanity only comes into fore in the face of immorality. When events dawn upon us which bump us out of our comfort zone, we begin to realize the fragility of our humanity. What does make an individual human? Does being human become limited to the use of spoken or written language, culture and making mistakes? (to err is human as they say) Our humanity has always been tied to our existence on this world. To this we may ask, does humanity go deeper than what we can imagine? Is there more to humanity than culture and spoken/written language? In his popular book to which this paper has been named after, psychologist Viktor Frankl provides simple answers to these questions. His experiences from the Nazi concentration camps not only gave him a chance to observe humanity at its barest essence, but also go through the same pains and small pleasures that inmates had to endure during those years. Humanity, as Frankl observes, aims to find a sense of purpose or meaning behind every event of pleasure and suffering to which an individual encounters. The instinct of survival is closely associated to one’s meaning of life. Without it, man becomes disheartened and thus, succumbs to death.

Death is one strong indicator of humanity. For the author of this paper, death presents itself as a sign of the finiteness of human life. It comes without warning, and the notion of it compels an individual who is aware that his death may be just around the corner to make full use of his lease on life. Death on the concentration camps as noted by Frankl, become ordinary events which are very contrasting to how modern outside society treats it. The conditions to which the inmates of the concentration camp were subjected can be very disturbing to an ordinary person whom has yet to experience the numerous horrors inside the camps. Deprivation of almost every comfort accessible to man outside of the camp led the prisoners to a state of heightened apathy. It came down to every man for himself, and survival hanged on the balance of the will to live, as Frankl observes. Suffering in an extreme degree has stripped down the individual, Frankl included, to the barest shred of humanity that they had. Aside from the withered and battered shape of their bodies, the blatant disregard for life by those who kept them in the camps have fostered a sense of disregard and hopelessness to life in itself. Should it be unbelievable to imagine that such torture has been endured by someone who actually survived and was able to tell about his experience? The author of this paper thinks so, and with this a vital point of humanity is seen: the will to live.

Frankl describes human will as the primary motivation of man to live and survive in his life. The human will is not a product of his primary instincts (i.e. the ego), but a manifestation of a unique meaning inherent in every human individual. In meaning we also relate the term objective or purpose, or an end to which a human is entitled to fulfill in his/her life. The willpower of a human is nourished by the will to life (or will to meaning in Frankl’s terms), love (in its many forms) and suffering. Why include suffering? Before answering this, we must first focus on how the will to live and love strengthen the ties that bind the human will together. The will to meaning, the general urge to find one’s purpose in life, provides man with a goal that is unique to him/her and which only he/she can accomplish. As Frankl notes, not all of us are able to see instantly the meaning of our lives. Some of us may have a hard time acquiring this, while others travel along paths which lead then further away from this. In the acquisition of this purpose, man finds stability and inner peace within himself together with a new general direction for his/her existence. What about love? Love, other than being a feeling, is a consolidating force which enables a person to see the fullest of another. It is through love, Frankl says, that a person’s full humanity is displayed. The human potential can only be seen through the eyes of the one who loves him, and it is this phenomenon which empowers individuals who share love with one another and lift each other in times of need. Love preserves the fire to live, and as Frankl shows in his book, his love and longing for his wife has been a crucial factor in his survival from the camps.

Suffering, though not something of pleasant orientation, also serves as a crucial factor in the fostering of the will. This combination of pain and stress is a key to highlight another point which defines humanity: the ability to change. In the face of a hopeless situation, or within the experience of suffering, man is given a chance to redefine himself. To find light in the midst of darkness, to be able to see hope in a dire scenario and to be able to transform defeat into a moral victory is a defining trait of humanity. The load of potential which is locked within an individual can be released by adversity, and by going through this problem man finds the virtue of sacrifice. The virtue of sacrifice alters the complexion of a man, and moreover, gives meaning to his suffering. The ability to see meaning in pain and suffering has been a skill unique to humanity. The actual process of experiencing distress enables man to improve upon himself even more, allowing him/her to actualize the human potential locked within. This property of suffering also feeds the human will, and thus completes the triumvirate for it.

Frankl’s book also details the fundamental human freedom, the freedom of choice. Humanity gives man the freedom to choose. In a lot of situations in our lives we are required to make choices, and a lot of times the choices we make have a lot of implications in the long run. Ranging from small and insignificant to big and life altering, the freedom of choice has always been inherent to man. According to Frankl, the practice of this freedom by an individual is a vital part to life. Ultimately the concept of choice directly puts into the hands of an individual the control for his/her life. In having sight of their respective purposes in life, one may choose to fulfill them and have inner peace, or do the opposite. Freedom works hand in hand with the human will to fully utilize the innate human potential of man. With these traits man is able to make use of his/her life to the fullest, IF this is the choice being made. Freedom and the human will guides an individual towards the actualization of his/her life’s meaning. They are the means provided by our humanity to achieve our own ends.

Humanity, when stripped of all the comforts and liberties it has enjoyed, bares itself in its purest before the eyes of an informed observer. The primary facets which include the human will and the freedom of choice allow an individual to attain an ultimate goal or end to which his/her life has become the means. The vast potential of humanity is unlocked by the raw power of the human will, and directed by the freedom of choice. The integration of these two gives clarity and direction to the human life. Abstract as it may seem, the achievement of man’s meaning leads to a sense of fulfillment and inner peace. At the end of the day, it is these two factors that give humanity a tangible face which can be seen, appreciated and used to develop oneself into his or her best.