Bagyooooooooooooooooooo!

ermmmm, ayan tapos na ang dalaw ni Milenyo sa Pinas... Papunta na siguro syang China.... Pero wait, may kasunod pa.. Si NENE!!! weeeee!!! oh nene!!!! amf!!!!

anyway, marami akong natutunan sa 2 araw na walang kuryente sa amin... Learning experience to ika nga nila.

TARSDAY: ang araw ng bagyo
- well, mga 11am daw dadaan si Milenyo sa Cavite, kaya kami hold your breath ang drama... Ako nga e naiisip pa yung sinasabi ni Beckham sa Adidas ad nya, "The typical calm before the storm." , well eto storm talaga...
- bago pa man mag-11, anlakas na ng hangin... Did someone turn on the wind tunnel? hahahaha!!!
- at nagsimula ang buong palabas.. Nature's wrath na to... ayun dinurog lahat ng bahay kubo sa amin pwera lang yung kina Miko (tigas ng bahay kubo nyo tsong!) at pinatumba yung puno sa basketball court....
- natapos ang part 1 (kasi sabi nila may part 2, totoo nga!) may break si Milenyo, sapat na oras para linisin yung tapat ng bahay kasi puro sya dahon at buuin ang tropa... Nakapaglaro pa nga kami ng basketball e...
- at dumating si part 2, tama ulit ang aming kapitbahay, mas malupit si part 2... Tumba lahat ng punong mangga sa amin..... dumating din si papa pero wala ako sa bahay kundi nasa kabila at pinanonood ang bagyo.. front row seats kami ng tropa...
- katakot yung bagyo, parang may bumabahing ng bumabahing ng malakas.. hahaha!!! nakakabuo rin sya ng mga little tornadoes na nakakatulong upang wasakin ang buong kapaligiran....
- natapos ang bagyo, wala na yung kuryente simula 10:30 ng umaga... basic survival kami ng pamilya.. sardinas at kanin lang!!! yahooo!!!!!
- maaga akong natulog dahil sa kabagutan.. hahaha!!!

PRAYDAY: da aftermath
5 things to do pag national blackout:
a. maglaro habang sumisikat ang araw, pag umuulan na, e di maligo sa ulan!
b. maggitara o matutong tumugtog ng isang musical instrument
c. makipagbonding with the tropa or with your brothers and sisters
d. linisin ang harapan ng bahay nyo lalo na kung kadaraan lang ng bagyo
e. lumaboy sa kung saan-saan at makichismis

ayan, sa sobrang kabagutan ko ay bukod pa riyan ang aking nagawa.. Kunwari pikturan ang sarili.. (kung saan pinagtawanan ako ng kalaro ko sa basketbol)

naglakad kami nina Ryan at Christian sa Toll Bridge upang bumili ng strings ng gitara.. Putol na kasi yung kay Ryan e. Masayang maglakad kung may kasama ka... hehehehe!!!

Mga alas-9 na nung nagkailaw sa amin at nung time na yun tinawagan ko ang bestfriend ko.. Na nabasagan ng bintana at di naligo ng 2 araw. YAK!!!! hahahaha!!!!

wow cool din pala ang bagyo... Marami kang mapupulot na aral! Hahahaha!!! Peace!!

burnout

Honestly I am so tired right now.. I just got to get this out first... So many things gone wrong this week.....
Let me give a little list of what went wrong:
- bought a cool dvd, but the eps. were in disarray. Had to replace it but stupid saleslady didn't know what I was blabbering about...
- got sick due to extreme heat and frustration
- got into an argument with someone (T_T)
- almost got killed due to boredom and rush hour traffic
- got twisted in an exam.. about to pierce professor with spear in the ribs
- always woke up with body pain...
- and so on and so on!!!!!!

wow, what a week it was.. And imagine that it wasn't the finals week.. But funny how it is, this must have been the most stressful if not frustrating week I've had in college... Exams usually don't bother me, but not the ones I took this week...

Oh boy, so much to do.. So little time. Better not procrastinate or else.....

I still don't know what's gotten onto my head this past week... I can't even walk straight when going home!!! DARN IT!!!! Sheeeeesh!!!!

Siguro masyado lang akong nabugbog.. Pero ala naman akong ginagawa!!! wah di ko magets to.. Am not even thinking straight right now... Arrrggghhh....

Hopefully by next week all of this will be gone... Hopefully!!!!!

When you think about little things too often, they get a wee bit draining... Yeah, I'm actually waging a silent battle, a losing one in that point. It just gets too draining.. But somehow, the guy up there gives me strength.. Somehow I am able to last another day... Shemay, nadadala ang aking pagkasentimental sa entry na ito... WAAAH!!!!

I learned an adage from watching one tree hill, goes like.. "Believing you'll do well is already half the fight."

Well, I'm curious about what the other half is.....

As I stare at my princess trapped inside glass..

Now Playing: Burnout + Burnout Ulit

Its 12 midnight, yet I'm still awake.. I need to think about something.. Something important to me.
Pasensya na kay Liana, di ko kaagad nakwento ang dapat ikwento. Sayang excited pa naman ako.. I guess it will have to wait.

One of the best souveneirs I got came from, well, her birthday bash. It was an effigy of a princess sealed inside a glass cube. "Her" refers to the one I met in high school. "Her" was my first bestfriend. "Her" changed me. And "Her", being the person I love the most outside of my family and God....

My beshie was right.. Someday, somehow, I'll be writing crap like this. One whole entry dedicated to her. Must be the rain... Or the silent treatment I got from her. Whatever that is, its making me emotional, or rather, sentimental right now.... Guess I'm gonna pour my whole heart out in the wee hours of the morning...

Our story was your typical boy-meets-girl series.. I was the bastard in high school, she was the goody-two-shoes... Basically, we're direct opposites.. But somehow, she found a way to get through me. She understood me. She made me feel good by doing good things. She became my bestfriend. The first. Eventually, she became the first person I loved...

Maybe I shunned the signs and all, on how religous and extravagant I was when I give gifts to her on christmas. On how I would text her every now and then. On how I savored every moment with her. On how affected I was when she left me. On how happy I was when we got back again. It wasn't your usual bestfriend anymore.. It was something different.

Its funny how I said to myself back then, that she was only going to be my bestfriend, nothing else... Funny that I told her about my fantasies about other girls, while the best one was right under my nose. It took me graduation and the freshman year of college to realize that, yeah I crossed the thin red line. It was already different ever since, maybe I just didn't take notice of it since I was busy becoming the best bestfriend there ever was for her....

Only a select few know about this, about how much she really meant to me. About how much I will go out of my way just to protect her and keep her safe.. For me, no matter how much I do, I still know I give her something better. I always wanted to give my best.. Its just rather sad that, she doesn't see it.. Or maybe she sees it but doesn't tell it to me...

Merong mga pagkakataon na minsan naiiisip ko, tigilan ko na kaya sya? Oo minsan nasasabi ko sa sarili ko, siguro di talaga sya kaya nangyari ang mga bagay-bagay.. Tao rin naman ako e, napapagod rin sa kakahabol. Habol ka ng habol, sige lang ng sige, para lang mapakita sa kanya kung gano sya kahalaga sa yo.. Tapos di rin naman nya mapapansin.. Pero nakakatawa, kahit na ganun na yung naiisip ko, di pa rin ako tumitigil. Di pa rin ako nadadala.. Mahal na mahal ko pa rin sya. uh oh, tangna cheesy na to.

Siguro siya umay na umay na sa kakulitan ko. To the point na wala na lang syang ginagawa, kunwari di ako buhay. haha sometimes being invisible really hurts..
The last time na nag-usap kami, sabi nya, kamuhian ko raw sya, kasi masama yung ginawa nya sa akin.. Pero di ko magawa yun. Di ko kayang magalit sa kanya.. Yung dating nangyari na galit ako sa kanya? Di totoo yun. Kunwari lang yun para mapansin nya ako...
I can't plant seeds of anger to someone I hold close to me. Maybe I'm blinded by love. No, I think not. I can see all her flaws and all. I already accepted her for who she is, and loved her for who she is, not who she isn't..

Sometimes I get so tired of chasing that I wait.. But waiting won't do anything. If someone tells you that love is a butterfly, which goes away whenever you chase it, don't listen to them. Get a net, because waiting for it to come to you is pointless. Love isn't destiny, it's a decision...
Siguro hindi lahat ng tao maiintindihan kung gaano talaga siya kaimportante sa akin. But I guess I won't be needing everybody's understanding to do what I have to do...

I haven't cried for some time now. Maybe its time to open the flood gates again... :)

sana by some freak chance mabasa nya to.. wala lang.. wish ko lang...

i absolutely love sugarfree's burnout.. its the song that i never get tired of listening to, and it helps me especially in the times when i doubt myself, and when i get tired of chasing, chasing and chasing....

well, back to staring at the glass princess.. when was the last time I wished for something to happen so badly? You know I'd happily give everything back to get a second chance... too bad for me..

when walking alone gets boring: epilogue

Being alone didn't bother me at all. Yeah I understood, there will be happy days, there will be sad days and all, but that's the reality of life.. It isn't fair, it shouldn't be, because if life was fair, man wouldn't be so intelligent...

I knew there will be times that I would be alone and all, that I would have to rely on myself to do what I was supposed to do. But still, we all have our exceptions. No matter how hard we cling unto our principles and ideologies in life, we need to understand that exceptions are part of the unfairness of life. It adds spice to it, it bends rules, changes perspectives and all.

Some people underestimate the true value of an exception. Yep, even people like me like to have some company every now and then. But then there will be the elite set of people you meet that you just can't live without...

In the long and winding road of life, we meet a lot of people. Sometimes they just pass us by at a glance, sometimes they stick with us all throughout. We chase our goals, we dream big, we laugh, we cry, we cope with the people who join in on our little journey.
But there will come a time for us to go forward, and meet a completely new set of people. Meron din namang pagkakaton na mag-isa lang tayong binabaybay ang mahabang landas ng ating mga buhay. Hindi natin alam kung kelan sya matatapos, kaya ang pinakamainam gawin, maging masaya sa bawat araw, magpasalamat sa panibagong pagkakataon na ibinigay ng Maykapal upang matuwid ang ating mga sarili. Kaya nga may ibang tao bukod sa atin e, para maibahagi ang kasiyahang nararamdaman natin upang ito'y lumago at sa gayon ay magsilbing halimbawa upang tularan ng iba...

Life is too broad to comprehend extensively, that's why the chase for a goal is all too often much more enjoyable than the goal itself. So, wouldn't it be nice for other people to partake in your quest for the life-long goal you have set for yourself? Let them be your stepping stones into turning you into the person who deserves to be happy, a complete and understanding individual who is capable of getting anything he or she wants, anytime. The best do not fall, but are rather set back by circumstance. But to be the best means to see one's imperfections and allow the people around him to fill the missing spaces in himself..

Sharing. For me the best difference of being alone and being with someone is the ability to spread the good around and allow it to grow. A team who won a championship is better than the superstar who single-handedly won a game.

As I end this moment of contemplative repose, I leave a simple message to the people around me. Thank you. Without you I am only half the person I am today. Although I am comfy being alone, it would be really nice if I had someone walking beside me on my way home.....

when walking alone gets boring

I just realized that I'm not an extrovert. Yeah, em not one of those people who come up in front of you just to say their usual hi's and hellos. I'm not the one who is known by half of the school population. I'm not the one you see on tv, hear on the radio or download from the internet too.

But I didn't say I'm trapped inside my shell. For as long as I know, I'm out of that place. Though there was a time that I went back inside for contemplation and self-destruction. Yessir I am out, but I didn't want myself to be found.

(tanga ng USA, natalo sa Greece)

My high school classmate,Pau, who studies in St.Paul doon sa Pedro Gil, may have uttered the best interpretation of me.
I didn't remember the exact words she said, but the gist of it was, in tagalog: oo nga si rc mayabang, pero di nyo alam konti lang ang taong pinagkakatiwalaan nyan. kaya di nyo talaga sya maiintindihan.

up to that point I didn't realize that earning my trust was such a pain. Well, I think a lot of people didn't care or didn't even try. I just thank God he sent me some people who, unconsciously did not overtly try to become friends with me, but altogether touched my soul and changed me.

Let me get one thing straight. I did enjoy high school. But, I'm not one of those who remain chained to their high school life. Sometimes I get headaches listening to people who say "college is hard I wish I was back in high school", "I wish I had my high school friends", "I miss my high school life", etcetera, etcetera.... Come on people please grow up.. Look around.. This ain't high school anymore.. I suggest you throw away your diploma and start all over again. Ok, now I sound bitter. Well, not really taking anything away from these people, I realized that, I'm not like them.

I was different. Had I shown a clip of my high school people would notice. I didn't go out and eat lunch with the same set of people, I didn't have a solid group. All I had were a few friends that I can count with my fingers. Maybe that was the reason that somehow being alone didn't bother me.

Now, well, I enjoy college. I'm part of those people who go forward with their lives. Hindi ako nakatali sa HS pero lumilingon ako kasi marami rin akong natutunan mula sa apat na taon ko sa Rogationist.

Maybe I burden my friends a lot, konti lang sila, tapos mas konti lang yung nakakaintindi sa akin. (actually, 2 lang sila) Not saying that some of the people who tried to help me didn't understand, but they don't know the real story. Sure I tell my problems, but not the whole shebang. I leave it to myself, and consider the suggestions they give. Nga pala, salamat sa tulong. Malamang di nyo kilala kung sinu-sino kayo, pero salamat ng marami. Sa lahat ng taong hayskul salamat.

Everytime I go home, I always take that long walk from the highway toward the jeepney terminal. Funny thing is, I do a lot of thinking when I walk. Lalo na kung umuulan. It gets me into a state of solitude, and clarity. It makes me think straight.

to be continued....